joke joke joke

This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing: 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?"

"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. You can put them with my two male talking parrots. I taught them to read the bible and pray the rosary."

The lady brings over her parrots and puts them in the priest's cage. "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?" they say.

One male parrot looks over at the other and exclaims, "Put the beads away. Our prayers have been answered!"







A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head to the hills to do some bear hunting. As he rounded the corner on a perilous twist in the trail, he and a bear collided. Before he knew it, his rifle went one way and he went the other, landing on a rock and breaking a leg. The ferocious bear was charging at him from a distance, and he couldn't move.

"Oh, Lord," the preacher prayed, "I'm so sorry for skipping services today. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish. Please Lord, make a Christian out of that bear coming at me!"

That very instant, the bear skidded to a halt, fell to its knees, clasped its paws together and began to pray aloud right at the preacher's feet.

"Dear Lord, bless this food I am about to receive..."









Female girlfriend to her blonde girlfriend: ”I went for a pregnancy test today.“ Blonde girlfriend asked: ”Oh, and was the test difficult?“







A couple had an argument whilst driving and then passes a pigfarm Husband asked sarcastically: ”relatives of yours?“ wife responds: ”Yip, my in-laws!“







Granny gets on to her bicycle…her little grandson asked her: ”Where are you going to, Granny?“ She replied:“ to the graveyard, my boy“. Grandson: “but who is going to bring the bicycle back!"

quotes

If you're a hopeless romantic, nothing can bring a smile to your face quite like cute love quotes can. The problem is, finding cute love quotes that aren't cheesy can be a bit harder than one might imagine. That being said, they are indeed out there. Here are 20 cute love quotes that are anything but cheese.

1. "Only when we give joyfully, without hesitation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means." ~ Leo Buscaglia

2. "Love builds bridges where there are none." ~ R. H. Delaney

3. "Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great." ~ Comte DeBussy-Rabutin

4. "Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell." ~ Joan Crawford

5. "When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out." ~ Elizabeth Bowen

6. "Love is too strong a word to say it too early, but it has too beautiful a meaning to say it too late." ~ Kurt Cornish

7. "What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork." ~ Pearl Bailey

8. "Love is the only gold." ~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson

9. "LOVE: The irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." ~ Mark Twain

10. "Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it." ~ Josh Billings

11. "I don't want to live-- I want to love first, And live incidentally." ~ Zelda Fitzgerald,

12. "Love is like an hourglass with the heart filling up as the brain empties." ~ Jules Renard

13. "Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle." ~ Crystal Middlemas

14. "Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile." ~ Franklin P. Jones

15. "Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise." ~ Samuel Johnson

16. "It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it." ~ Francois De La Rochefoucauld

17. "If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools." ~ Katherine Mansfield

18. "Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence." ~ H. L. Mencken

19. "Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love" ~Albert Einstein

20. "Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is." ~ Diane Ackerman

Who says cute love quotes have to be cheesy? These twenty love quotes prove otherwise. The next time you find an anti-romantic in need of romantic inspiration, share these cute love quotes with them and prove that love is worth pursuing!

so what?

FaVoRitE sOnG oF tEens

I'm way too cool for ya boy
That's why it'll never work
I'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over
Damn all these beautiful girls
We're only gonna do your dirt
We'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over

Yeah yeah

I remember when
I was hanging with my friends
That's when I caught your eye
You thought that I was fly
Right then you wished that I would be your baby (be your baby)
You try to get some game
Asking me girl what ya name
All that ice upon ya chain
So I asked you the same
Something tells me that we have fun together (fun together)

I ain't easy to find
I'm a one of a kind
Oh when I judge your wine
I know your only mine
Tonight is yours
Tomorrow is for another guy (another guy)

I'm way too cool for ya boy
That's why it'll never work
I'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over
Damn all these beautiful girls
We're only gonna do your dirt
We'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over

You've been calling me
Leaving messages all week
Was your curiousity
Got ya knees weak
I'm not looking for a man
So I don't want no confusion (no confusion)
I took ya to the floor
Got ya begging me for more
But that was my queue to go
So I hit the door
I let you hot
With your mind used to running wild (running wild)

I ain't easy to find
I'm a one of a kind
Oh when I judge your wine
I know your only mine
If you stick around
Be careful not to fall in love (fall in love)

I'm way too cool for ya boy
That's why it'll never work
I'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over
Damn all these beautiful girls
We're only gonna do your dirt
We'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over

Now a couple months have past
Never thought that this would last
Oh everybody asked
How ya got a girl like that
But you should've known
That nothing lasts forever (lasts forever)
I mashed up ya mind
When I tell you lies
But boy don't be suprised
That I'm seeing other guys
I'm too young to settle
And you should've known better (known better)

Damn all these beautiful girls (you should have known)
We're only gonna do your dirt (cos I'll have)
I'll have you suicidal, suicidal
When I say it's over

InFo aboUt pAroKyA ni EdGaR

Myspace Codes: MyNiceSpace.com

Ang Pambansang Banda ng Pilipinas

Parokya ni Edgar is a bunch of guys, six to be exact, who unexpectedly find themselves in a proper band, with a proper recording contract with a proper record company (Universal Records), which gives them a proper "recording career". Parokya ni Edgar is Chito Miranda and Vinci Montaner on vocals, Darius Semaña and Gabriel CheeKee on guitars, Buhawi Meneses on bass and Dindin Moreno on drums. But beneath the silly gags and the punchlines, the Parokya Band has matured musically. Chief lyricist and frontman Chito Miranda once declared: "Nagti-trip lang talaga kami, eh." But by jokester/slacker standards, this band is already an overachievers: six albums with an endless string of hit singles (including one that inspired a movie), loads of music awards, and a fan base that extends all the way from Aparri to Tawi-Tawi. What could be a greater feat than have the whole country chanting: "Hoy-hoy-hoy-hoy-hoy-hoy!"?

"Our music is happy Filipino chop suey music. Our musical influences are modern world music."

Countless Gold and Platinum Record Sales Awards, MTV Awards and Awit Awards trophies later, PnE is showing no signs of slowing down with their latest release Halina Sa Parokya . Like any other Parokya album; comic skits, spoofs and heaps of classic Parokya humor abound in Halina Sa Parokya. The idea for their album artwork was inspired partly by the Department of Tourism thrust to promote various tourist destinations and local festivities via their Wow Philippines campaign (if you can recall the TV advertisement which featured Regine Velasquez). The album was also inspired by both the popular children's TV show Sesame Street and its local counterpart Batibot . Taking aloook at the album cover alone, you will laugh at the colorful characters Chito, Buwi, Vinci, Gab, Darious and Dindin portray!

And surely, too, it will be more obvious to tell why Parokya ni Edgar has been dubbed as "Pambansang Banda ng Pilipinas."

ehemmm

hahay waz jud ko naminaw samong proba kay nagnet2x lang ko dwi...advantage man gud kay naa ko sa last unit naglingkod...ajejeje...karon lang bitaw...maya nako magreview kay waz ko sa mood karon...ajeje..come wat may nalang ni karong longquiz...basta maya naju...hahay pirti ju ni lang paminaw...ako ani bz au cge ug typ2x...nastress kau ko kay unli man gud ko...samok kau ang grup message kay kafoi au...pass sa ko karon kay lowbat man gu ko...bwicit ni akonh cp kay dali ra kau malowbat...hahay kaliso sa lyf...hoy mga blogers ,waz lang...hi lang sa inyo...hapit nasad sat...relax nasad mi...pwo li i mi karelax kay apat magstudy...ad2 mi igos karong sat...laag2lang mi..ana jud ng mga laagan bisag asa moabot...yehey waz mi klase ugma sa OR..hay salmat makasawa naman gud ang nawong ni sir Canda...guyz ingatz nalang mo ha ug sa akoa pud...humana among klase..ajejej